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5 USEFUL TIPS ON HOW TO GET ALONG WITH YOUR MOTHER-IN-LAW

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1. Don’t give her reasons to hate you.

Stepping out of line or exhibiting disdain are both things you want to avoid doing. Even in the face of blatant nastiness, be the bigger person and play nice (despite how frustrating it might be). So long as you mind your Ps and Qs, it’s not your problem that your partner’s mother still isn’t fond of you.

2. Be patient with her.

It takes time to earn her trust in order to receive her blessings. You may just be accumulating resentment by forcing yourself to handle such tough situations consistently in a politically correct way. Hard as it is to believe, know that this too shall pass.

3. Ensure your partner is on the same page as you are.

The last thing you want is to feel like you’re being ganged up on by him and his mother. Voice your concerns. The least he can do is mediate. If he supplements his mother’s ammunition or sides with her when he knows her actions are unjust, then this relationship has just called for a performance review.

4. Don’t let her ruin your relationship.

This isn’t Shakespeare and you’re not the Juliet to your Romeo. Don’t let the matriarch come between you and your consort. The warning signs are clear when half your fights revolve around his mother.

5. Don’t try too hard to make her to like you

When all’s said and done, and there’s nothing more you can do to mitigate the animosity, in the words of Disney’s snow queen: let it go. After all, you’re not in a relationship with your lover’s mother. You don’t really need her to be smitten with you. It would be nice, but it’s not a pressing necessity. The sooner you realise that you can’t and don’t have to please everyone, the better off you’ll be.

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OLD TAXI UNCLE: THANKS TO THE KIND YOUNG MAN WHO HELP ME CHANGE BURST TYRE

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<Facebook compliment by Loh Seow>

I am night relief SHA1424D had a flat tyre in Seletar airport @ about1.45 am this morning. While I was struggling to change the tyre, SH9472U a handsome young man stopped his car infront of mine. Without saying a word he change for me the tyre and left.

He refused to give his name and my monetary offer for his time lost. He smiles all the way. Any one know this young man? Please extend my sincere thanks to him again. He really help this 67 years old man a lot today.

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NSMEN GO NUTS AFTER BMTC SHOW NSF DO SIT-UPS AT PARADE SQUARE WITH YOGA MATS

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Dear ASS Editors,

I spotted this on BMTC facebook page yesterday. Look at these pussy soldiers nowadays, they do sit up at parade square oso need to put yoga mat. If no yoga mat will burn their backs and their mommies will complaint to the CO is it?

Are our soliders becoming so soft, weak, guniang and useless? Cannot even tahan some heat and sand on their backs? Are these pussy soldiers ready to defend our nation or doing BMT for fun?

Last time we do PT on the parade square, we do not even wear t shirts let along use yoga mat. You know how hot the fucking floor is? We all doing until blisters on our backs and we lan lan suck thumb.

Stop mollycoddling our 18 year old boys and start treating them as men and train them into men, not guniang please! Don't be a disgrace to the SAF and train up a generation of strawberries.

Boon Hock
A.S.S. Contributor

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WESTMALL CLEANER CAUGHT USING BRUSH FOR TOILET BOWL & SINK

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hi ass

i come across this cleaner today at westmall. at first i mind my own business and do things, but suddenly i notice this disgusting act.

this cleaner who is cleaning the toilet bowls came out from a cubicle after washing it, so she is holding this brush. i thought maybe she going put back the brush and do other thing but then she use the same f**king brush to wash the hand sinks

f**king disgusting can? this is the same brush that wash shit and now use to wash the sink where we wash our hands and face? auntie don't know basic hygiene?

i wanted to tell her off for doing such a disgusting thing but she is a fierce lady, i don't want to cause a scene so I decided to take a photo and lodge a complaint.

this is the evidence of her using the brush which i took from the entrance. you can tell she actually don't care whether people see her do it or not.

Anonymous
A.S.S. Contributor

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VIVIAN BALAKRISHNAN: NO REPORTS OF S'POREAN CASUALTIES IN JAKARTA BOMB ATTACK

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<Facebook Update by Foreign Minister Vivian Balakrishnan>

Monitoring the situation in Jakarta with great concern. Our embassy is contact tracing all Singaporeans on our register. We do not have any reports of Singaporean casualties so far.

Singaporeans in Jakarta should e-register with MFA at https://eregister.mfa.gov.sg/

Singaporeans can also contact our Embassy at +62811863348 or MFA 24-hr Duty Office at 63798800/55.

 

<Warning: Viewer Discretion Advised>Jakarta bomb explosion close up! Scary! :O #PrayForJakarta

Posted by Cool Singapore Bureau on Wednesday, January 13, 2016

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LOANSHARK SPLASH PAINT ON CHILDCARE AT PINNACLE@DUXTON

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At about 6 in the morning, it was discovered that loansharks had left a debt collection message on the childcare center located on the 3rd floor of Pinnacle@Duxton.

Paint was splashed on the back door, signage and windows of the childcare.

It is believed that the manager was taken away by the police in spite of her pleas that she was innocent.

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ANG MO FINED, NOT JAILED, FOR PUNCHING LOCAL TEENAGER AFTER ACCIDENT

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An enraged Briton Alan Benjamin Maybury, 34, went ballistic on a 19 year-old local teenager, Lum Kwok Weng, 19, after the latter's car crashed into a taxi that he and his wife were travelling in at about 1.30AM on 30th November 2014 along South Buona Vista Road.

According to court proceedings, at about 1.30AM that day, Mr Lum had been driving his mother's Toyota Camry car down South Buona Vista Road with a friend seated in the front passenger seat. At about the same time, Maybury and his wife were travelling in a taxi in the opposite direction.

While negotiating a bend, Mr Lum lost control of his vehicle and skidded into the lane of the incoming taxi, crashing head on into the vehicle. Both Mr Lum and his friend were shocked and remained in their car.

In a rage, Maybury alighted from the taxi, hurled expletives at Mr Lum and pounced on the younger man, punching him multiple times in the face.

He was stopped by a passing motorcyclist who intervened and called the police. His vicious assault left Mr Lum with a swollen face and a 0.5cm cut.

In his defence, Maybury's lawyer said that his client acted this way "because of certain extreme and extenuating factors operating on his mind and psyche'' immediately after and as a result of the accident. He says that Maybury and his wife were injured due to Mr Lum's "dangerous and reckless conduct", and seeing his wife injured gave rise to Maybury's rage.

He was slapped with a fine of $5,000 for his assault against the local teen. Maybury could have been jailed for up to two years and fined for voluntarily causing hurt.

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GOVERNMENT GIVING UP S'POREAN JOBS TO INDONESIAN GRADS?

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Indonesian grads to compete for employment with local grads. Are local grads competent to employ?

The future for local grads getting employed in Singapore will become even more bleak when the government brings in more foreigners to work here. Indonesian grads are the latest to be added on the list to be "invited" here to work. Bala Vivian in Indonesia for manpower development to allow local companies to recruit talents from Indonesia.

PLEASE READ HERE :
http://www.channelnewsasia.com/news/singapore/singapore-indonesia/241952...

Motivates of why the government is constantly encouraging foreign employment are questionable.

1) they have been unhappy and complaining locals are asking for high salary. Lee Hsien Loong in particular voiced his unhappiness about local grads are paid higher than Japanese grads.
http://statestimesreview.com/2015/10/26/lee-hsien-loong-japan-is-more-co...

2) they want locals to be paid low - not able to meet the CPF minimum amount requirement to get back CPF money. There have been talks about how our CPF money is used . . . . . .

Government has the responsibility to protect the livelihood of the nation, uniqueLEE Singapore we have government doing otherwise. Since after election, we see more and more crap from the ruling party.

R.
A.S.S. Contributor

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CPF FORCING STUDENT TO PAY FOR MEDISHIELD PREMIUMS WHEN HE DOESN'T EVEN HAVE A JOB

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Hi ASS Editors,

I'm a 20+ years old full-time student in a local public university. Recently I received this letter from CPF saying that I have to pay my own MediShield insurance premiums. First off, I'm not even working! So good luck deducting some non-existent amount (there's probably a little inside from my the NSF ORD contribution). Second, how can the government just change the terms of a contract whenever they like? I don't care if this is to "protect" my father's CPF or what. My father never consented to this, and now they are going to make me pay for it.

You might think that it is my filial duty to pay for my own MediShield. But here is my position. I never even consented to the MediShield scheme in the first place, MediShield is just another way for the PAP to suck people's money dry, without any transparency of where the money goes. Furthermore, my father views it as his duty to support his kids until we are able to support ourselves.

So I'm now in a situation where I have no ability to pay for something I didn't consent to, that my father is willing to cover me until I start work, that the government had just ignored his wishes and is trying to shift what he see as his burden onto me.

The debts of the parents are now the debts of the children. What a wonderful country we live in!

Chan
A.S.S. Contributor

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MANY SACRIFICES MADE BY TEACHERS IN SINGAPORE

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This email is with regard to the news that MOE wishes to start charging teachers for parking. While the public remains divided about this issue, and many are quick to point out that teachers had a pay rise last year, none of the forums point out the following realities for teachers in MOE schools:

1) When there are a recession about 6 to 7 years ago, salary increments were frozen for MOE’s teachers. Teachers did not get any wage increments that year.

2) In many schools, it is not uncommon for teachers to often fork out their own cash several times a year to pay for things for their students.

These can range from meals to treat their form class and subject classes several times a year (e.g. Children’s Day, Youth Day, Graduation Farewell Presents, end of CCA season, school year farewell makan session for kids to celebrate them graduating up to the next level and a new form class, yearend CCA bonding Camps etc) to even helping students who are on financially needy schemes pay for stationary, enrichment books etc. Some teachers even make it a point to sometimes bring extra servings of lunch or breakfast for students whom they know are at risk and somehow don’t know how to help themselves. They’ll eat with the student during break and use that opportunity to offer a listening ear, a voice of stability and a hot meal.

Teachers are generally not a calculating lot of people and the paperwork is quite daunting when making claims so they seldom make these claims or these purchases can’t be claimed (how do you claim a meal treat to encourage your graduating students before an exam especially if you have easily 3 to 4 classes of graduating students, and yet giving these meal treats and buying little graduation souvenirs for every single one of your graduating students is something that kids really, really appreciate and treasure)?

Teachers also often end up driving to students’ homes to give them lifts e.g. if they are recalcitrant and don’t come to school so teachers painstakingly drive to their homes to fetch them but these teachers don’t make transport claims. Similarly, when kids are sick in school, during camp etc etc, it’s not uncommon for teachers to fetch the students home or fetch them to the doctor and then fetch them home and all of these transport costs are not claimed. Whoever has the car and happens to not be teaching in class at that point in time, just chips in and helps out.

Similarly, when teachers rush from school to HQ or to other schools to attend briefings in the afternoon, very few of them claim transport costs or to even claim for parking at HQ (which is very costly).

In schools e.g. teachers also spend their own money to buy stationary (marking pens, files, notebooks etc) for their own use as teaching resources as schools don’t provide these. Schools will provide photocopying paper and whiteboard markers but if you’re a teacher organizing your notes etc for teaching, you pay for your own stationary.

3) It’s also not uncommon for senior management in schools like department heads, subject heads, level heads, school leaders etc to contribute money out of their own pockets to buy gifts to appreciate their various departmental teams and staff e.g. treating them to dinner, contributing financially to the annual staff dinner, buying staff gifts during teachers’ day, various celebratory days in the year etc etc.

Unlike in the private sector, there are no expense accounts for these things.

A talk to ordinary teachers from heartland schools will reveal a lot about the extent to which teachers pay many things out of their own pockets to help their students and their fellow teachers.

All of these add up to hundreds of dollars, sometimes much more, a year, but teachers do all this to help and encourage their students and their fellow teachers so does the decision to charge teachers for parking in schools make any sense? We ask for a society with empathy so how do we support, encourage people who demonstrate much empathy for others in their daily work?

Concerned Member of the Public
A.S.S. Contributor

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S'PORE ZOO IGNORES VIEWER'S COMPLAINTS OF EXCESSIVE USED AGAINST SHOW DOG

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Dear ASS Editors,

About one month ago, I wrote in to A.S.S regards to an incident that happened at the Singapore Zoo, during the Animal Friends Shows.
http://www.allsingaporestuff.com/article/zoo-staff-used-excessive-force-...

on the 12th January 2016, I went again to watch their first show at 11am. The show was good until the end. However, what upset me was during the dog’s sniffing behavior segment, the same keeper came out with a Golden Retriever. I was shock.

Despite their colleagues being around during the previous incident that they did not seems to have addressed the problem. An act of that kind is not to be taken lightly. Yet, there he was, working the show dog again when he was seen using force against one the previous time?

Is the zoo closing one eye to this incident and why are they not condemning such behavior?

Animal Lover
A.S.S. Contributor

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NEA SHOULD FINE GRASSCUTTERS WHO LITTER NTU FLOOR WITH CABLE TIES

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Dear A.S.S,
 
Walking up my beautiful nanyang house slope.
Saw all over the ground these plastic strips one the grass patch and road.
 
 
 
 
 
This contractor should teach the workers to gather and throw the used strip into proper rubbish bin!
NTU supervisors of area cleaning should also wake up and enforced the checkingS of work carried out!!
 
These NEA should find and summon these grass cutters for littering and throwing plastic thread onto the floor! 
 
NTU should do something about such pollution act!
 
Whatmeworry

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TIPOFF! NOT THE FIRST TIME SJH7676T TOYOTA ROAD BULLY SPOTTED ABUSING FELLOW DRIVERS

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<Tip-off by Philip Ng>

You posted a video showing road bully SJH7676T harassing a driver for cutting his lane when the victim did not. The bully wound down his window and started abusing with vulgarities. Even though the driver ignored the bully, the bully started to drive recklessly by cutting into his lane and brake purposely. The bully also swerved his vehicle in front of the victim's vehicle and came down to confront him. You can see the video below.

I like share that I had a similar bad encounter with this same road bully driver of SJH7676T back in 5 December 2015. I captured his photo and think this should be shared with our fellow drivers. This gangster driver needs to be taken off our roads and reported to the police.

 

"On 12 Jan 2016, I was travelling along the exit of CTE at Ang Mo Kio Ave 3 towards Hougang when a car (SJH7676T) horned me. I sounded my horn slightly and gesture why did he horn. When I stopped at the traffiic junction, the driver wound down his window and started abusing me with vulgarities saying that I cut into his lane. I ignored him and proceed with the lights turned green. He then started to drive recklessly by cutting into my lane and brake purposely. My wife who was beside me who was afraid keep telling me ignore the driver which I had no intention of confronting as my young daughter is in my car.When I reached the junction of Ang Mo Kio Ave 3 and Yio Chu Kang, I thought it was the end of the saga. But the driver followed me and stopped beside me continuing his abusive languages. I continued to ignore him. He then suddenly swerved his vehicle to stopped in front of my vehicle and came down to confront me. I wound down my window and asked him what he wants. He says that I cut into his lane and horn him and continued his verbal abuses.What I am furious are his vulgar words targeted at my young daughter. Anyway, I have lodged a police report and forwarded the video to Traffic Police."<Credit: Beh Chia Lor - Singapore Road>

Posted by All Singapore Stuff on Wednesday, January 13, 2016

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CRUDE OIL CRASHES BUT PETROL PRICES DIP SLIGHTLY: STOP PROFITEERING OFF S'POREANS

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Dear ASS,

I wish to expose the double standards of petrol companies in Singapore. Whenever oil prices surge, they adjust petrol prices almost instantly. Now that oil prices have crashed to twelve year lows, petrol prices did not dip in tandem but only moderately. Why is this the case?

When it benefits them and enable companies to make more profits, they speedily push up petrol prices but when it's time to return savings to consumers, they cite all kinds of excuses of their slow decrease.

Companies use the same poor reasons that other factors play a part in petrol prices such as refining, marketing and distribution costs. How come they never cite such costs when adjusting upwards?

The government needs to step in and stop petrol companies from profiteering off Singaporeans! This is unfair pricing and should be adjusted in tandem with the crash in crude prices!

Charlie Ng
A.S.S Contributor

Chart credit: www.cozylittlehaven.net/petrolsg

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EVEN STUDENT IS AFFECTED BY RICH POOR DIVIDE IN SCHOOL

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Dear ASS,

I am a sec 4 student.

There are some things that I would like to share. Please bear with me.

It is the 2nd week of school. As usual, when my classmates meet in class for the first day of school, they begin to talk about their holidays. Some went to London, some to Australia, and some to Kuala Lumpur. I cannot help but to feel envious. Why?

I come from a low-middle income family. My father is a taxi driver. My mother is a housewife. She needs to stay home to care for my paralysed grandmother.

We don't have a lot. We are not too poor too. I mean when I watch tv, there are people who are worse off then me. I know my friends don't mean it, but every time they say things like, "oh everyone fly overseas for the holidays" or "everyone has an iPad..." I feel very affected. I don't have branded clothes or an iPad at home. I had to think for so long just to try Llao Llao yogurt for the first time coz my friends were all trying it.

As it is, my parents cannot afford to take me and my younger siblings on holiday. My father would insist on working even though he is sick as he has to pay rental for the taxi. My grandmother's needs also put a strain on my parents. She needs medication, diapers, moisturisers, doctor appointments etc.

Some times I feel like I cannot click with my friends. Even though they invite me to study outside with them, I cannot join them. They like to go to Starbucks where the drinks are very expensive to me. Once, they sort of tried to accomodate me so we studied at MacDonalds but somehow, they prefer Starbucks.

I know that they are not bad kids. Just kids who are luckier than me and much more fortunate.

Sometimes I cannot help but wonder if I am in this state coz my parents didn't do a planned parenthood.

I still love them.

EMO kid
A.S.S. Contributor

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THIS TAXI DRIVER PROVIDES THE BEST CUSTOMER SERVICE: DRINKS, SWEETS & OTHER GOODIES

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Hello All Singapore Stuff,

I want to bring to yr attention this taxi I boarded. We always hear about taxi driver provide bad customer service but not this taxi driver. Check out the good service he provides.

He has very good manners and provide sweets and refreshments for his passengers. This is not all, he provide charging points for our smartphones and provide all the different charging points so be it Apple, Android or Tablets, you can charge it.

If this is not good service, I don't know what is. Next time when you read a complaint about bad customer service, remember there are good taxi uncles out there who do their best everyday. Don let the black sheeps spoil the reputation of all cabby.

Have a good day.

Felix Cheong
A.S.S. Contributor

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MUSLIM: SHOULD I DIVORCE MY CHINESE WIFE BECAUSE SHE PREVENTS OUR KIDS FROM VISITNG MY PARENTS

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Dear A.S.S,

I am in an inter-racial marriage. I'm a Muslim while my wife is a Chinese free-thinker. We've known each other for more than half a lifetime and married for 12 years.

Since we got married, she has never stepped foot into my parents' home and she has disallowed me to bring our 2 kids (10 and 2) to see my parents. I am very disappointed about it but we remained an otherwise happy family (most of the time). But since the passing of my father 3 months ago, my mother has been pestering me to see the kids and my siblings also started to pressure me. For avoidance of doubt, I do not stop her parents from seeing our kids.

Even know she knows that she is being unreasonable, my wife once said that she doesn't like my family to the extent that she doesn't want to be associated with them. She admits that maybe she is afraid that our kids will become Muslim.

Now, I am considering a divorce so that I can bring the kids to see my mom etc during visitation time. I even said it to our 10 year old. My kid told me that it did not bother him not knowing his father's side, but it bothered him that his parents would no longer be together.

Should I divorce my wife because of our irreconciliable differences when it comes to our children's religion, or should I stick with her for the sake of our children?

Mohd J.

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HELP! MY MOTHER-IN-LAW BULLIES ME AND TURNS MY HUBBY AGAINST ME

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Dear Editors,

I have many conflicts with my mother in law. She has the tendency of passing sarcastic remarks on me like for instance today she blame my husband for breaking his promise of remaining single.That promise was made before he met me. What is she insinuating? Is she trying to tell me that her son should not marry me? I mean how can a mother make her son promise her that he would remain single?

Then last few days she said that if I didnt get married to her son, I would be played and dumped by guys again and again till 38 years old I am still a spinster. How can she humiliate me like this?

I mean i can forgive her once, but I cannot keep forgiving her if she continue with all these sarcastic remarks.

Then when I ignore her she would talk to me or buy me small things, as I am a soft hearted person I forgive her, then few days later she start her nonsense again to irritate me. Its like a repeated cycle everytime, I start to suspect its her trick of making me fall into her trap just to give her an opportunity to attack me. She is bullying me with words.

Last time when she pass nasty remarks on me, I would confront her harshly and she would go round telling others that I shouted at her, that I bully her. No matter what, I am at a losing end as all her sons would side with her.

The worst part is that when she pass such sarcastic remarks on me, she would say it with a smiling face so that everyone will think she is joking, by the way, got people joke about such matter?

Even my husband does not side with me, he said I bully his mum. not a word of consolation from him. I already told him many times that I cannot get along with his mum. But he kept compelling me to stay with her. I felt so tormented.

Can someone advise me how to handle my mother in law?

Sheena K

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FOREIGN WORKER GRABS LOCAL GIRL'S THIGHS IN BUS DESPITE HER PROTESTS

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Unbelievable. This guy was sitting beside me in the bus and his hands were touching my thighs, thereafter I shouted "can you keep your hands to yourself?"

Guess what? It was great for the next 5 minutes. He came back to the same position, loitering his dirty hand near to my seat. I purposely took a picture with flash however it didn't scare him away.

Got off the bus, went to the control station straight and ask the officer to stop him when I called the police.

Girls beware. Don't be afraid to stand up for what is right and let the pervert know that whatever he is doing is WRONG!

Ms Wong
A.S.S. Contributor

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EX-GF: TRIED TO FORCE PATRIOTIC S'PORE BF TO MOVE TO INDONESIA, I WAS WRONG

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EDITOR of all singapore stuff,

May i request to you to publise my article. I would like to take this opportunity to say sorry to someone i have hurt 10 years ago and also to remind those who are in love, to always be grateful and dont take your partner for granted. Thank you in advance.

I am 10 years late. I apologize for the decision made 10 yeas ago. You were patriotic, wanting to serve the nation, excited and deligient in your work in the government sector. I should'nt have asked you to leave everything behind to follow me back to Indonesia.

I knew that you wanted a fullfilling career more than a glamours life. But i have to returm back to Indonesia to take over our family business as my parents are old. I am unwillingly letting go of you and yet regretted that i have made that decision 10 years ago. I always

Knew how you treated me. You made me feel precious and love, always, in your unique way. I believe no one will ever treat me like you did.

I have to leave due to circumstances you knew and its never a easy decision. Though we lead our life seperately, i have never let go of the relationship we once held, never let go the thoughtfullness and love you have given me in that 4 years. I knew you were in relationships after i left, though i believe its not easy for you to overcome and forget, but you move on. I am happy for you but sour that the person next to you is not me. But i dont blame you, as i am the one who walked away, leaving you behind. All this years, i have not committed in another relationship. I cant bring myself to love another person. I have sent cakes and gift to your place on your birthday for 10 years but i guess all have went down the chute. I have tried contacting you, but i knew you purposely avoided me and change your numbers on several occasions which i can fully understand why.

I am not writing to ask for your forgiveness nor second chance. I knew that you are happily with your M. I am happy for you. I just wanna let you know thatin this world, there is still me who is here, praying for you, keeping watch over you and living for you. I just want to share my story to those who take their loves one for granted. You sill never know how hurt and painful it is till you lose it. Be brave to fight for what you want and who you love. For those who love you will never come back and be the same after you lost them. Dont live a regretted life like me.

I wish you and your M happy, blissful and everlasting.

J. Susi
A.S.S. Contributor

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